I think I'm going to inject the gummy vitamins with vodka
I'm glad you're using your medical degree for some good for once
Go for the frenulum. Its like eating a popsicle. They go nuts with that shit.
Before I dignify that with an answer, let me get this straight. You're asking me if I wiped my ass on the towels?
Oh so it was one of those "I shouldn't have gotten in a cab with a random 21 year old girl" kinda nights.
She just got out of the car and said "hold on purse.. It's going to be a bumpy ride"
I just want him to slap me with his dick and call it love
Just because its your birthday does not mean u can play quarters by dropping quarters into cups to make me drink.
So i just got guilted into doing a tequila shot by a group of guys chanting "USA!" at me.
She just admitted to me that she was a pinecone.
Sudden memory flashback: drunk me outside ripping my tampon out and throwing it into the neighbors yard, silently cheering 'time for sexxxx'. I sense a dangerous pattern emerging
I'm at the hospital waiting for my sister to push out her kid. I think I'll roam the halls and shame all the teenage mothers.
It's a goat... but where the fuck did it come from?
He shattered his pelvis base jumping so his dicks out of commission for 4 months. Your up, second string.
The best thing about this time of year is that all I have to do is add a random mardi gras decoration to my cart full of alcohol and boom, no more judging
you found yr lighter in yr cleavage and said so that's where you've been all my life
Randomize
