I just watched Juno. I kind of wish I was in highschool and pregnant
i miss you so much
i miss you too
oops, did i send that to you? i meant to send it to the money you owe me
rhymes with "ouble enetration"
I'm good, just tired from chardonnay and giving hand jobs.
By the end of the second bowl I was making sound effects to every hand movement he made.
you broke into my aparment at three in the morning wearing long johns and offered me beer.
I just watched Jersey Shore so I would know what rock bottom was when I reach it.
Lets start the night off early. Those Coronas arent going to throw themselves up.
Yes theres a double standard. Get over it. Fuck the critics and go be the slut you were born to be
I don't think you seem to understand this concept. WHEN A GAY GUY HANDS YOU A DAIQUIRI, YOU DRINK IT.
So it finally happened last night... I re-met someone that i've already had sex with. Had no idea who he was. Fantastic
Side note... I would pay good money to have witnessed the reaction of onlookers as I sprinted down Armtiage with a 15 lb bag of peanuts under my arm
Clothes make me feel like a responsible adult and that's just not something I'm ready to handle.
His 12 year old sister has bigger boobs than me and now that's all I can think about when we have sex
I'm telling you, this vagina is really making the rounds lately...
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