You hook up with other guys, let him talk to other girls.
no
My e-date is really photogenic. Real-life not so much
With the way things had been going, I was never more excited for a person to cum
It's like Facebook knows when I'm about to masturbate and tells me to reconnect with exes.
Having sex with her is like doing taxes, Happens once a year and I usually end up paying.
The tornado sirens were going off and everyone just ran to the liquor store. .
Drunk me thinks I can light up a cig anywhere, sober me finds this hilarious and highly irresponsible. The grocery store is not a bar.
Sadness tears and throw up everywhere
I was riding her and she yelled "fuck me" then someone in the room next door yelled "you don't have to say it if youre doing it."
This must be what defeat feels like to Tom Brady today. I bet he wishes he could barf up all of his bad decisions from yesterday, too.
Moral of the story: don't have drunken shower sex with the lights off...or you WILL break your foot. And the shower knobs.
Turns out she left way earlier. So I'm stuck with this guy asking where he can score meth and if I'm really straight.
All I'm saying is that if you have time for a 20 min shower bj you have time for me
Every time I start to think he's just not worth the trouble, he puts his face down there and I wanna buy him a car
He drunk texted me what I think is two snails fucking on a mushroom. Is "you sick bastard" too mild a rejection?
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