why didn't you poke me back
How do you jack off and text at the same time?
On my iPhone they have an app for that
A hot woman with candy. This is what heaven is filled with
oh my she just said cum sticks to her dentures so when she blows if they let her she takes them out
Went to mcdonalds... Wishing I could throw up the last 20 hours of my life.
Thought you might like this. Had a dance off with an andy bernard look alike and pissed my bed. All in one night.
Halloween 2010: the NuvaRing girls. You're Thursday. We'll walk into the party chanting "Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday, Thursday, Friday, Saturday, Sunday, Everydaaay".
i woke up next to the toilet with a chipped tooth, somebody elses shirt on, and a random guys id in my pocket
Sorry for trying to force you and Robert to make out. I didn't realize how awkward it was until I woke up today.
Thanks for pulling me out of the bed by my feet atleast one of us was sober enough to know I had work at 5 am.
Prepare for tons of dick. I mean dick by the bucket loads. Waterfalls if cock.
I can't even masturbate anymore!! That was my last source of cardio!!
Just do let me go home with anyone especially I a guy with a hair sweater
Halfway through the blowjob she stopped and said 'Wait I know this dick'.
I was hoping for a marriage proposal... Or at least an offer to sleep in his bed.
Randomize
