So now everyone thinks I don't know what a condom is
you were the other women for BOTH people in the relationship?
She asked how far humans have gone into a volcano because they did in spy kids. She was serious.
I didn't sleep with her. I'm boycotting arizona and she's from phoenix.
then he said "your boobs looked so much bigger on girls gone wild"
I forgot about that,good spring break.
You just kept yelling at the cabby "I own this cab" and insisted on smoking with all the windows up
I mean... It's a win/win situation. I mentor the kid for an hour and then I get to fuck his mom. I know deep down I'm helping them both
All I know is she walked in crying with a bag of limes and a bottle of tequila and has been locked in her room blasting lil wayne ever since.
Which I'm also surprisingly fine with. If he walked into the bedroom naked, holding a fish in one hand and a lit candle in the other and said "Let's get fucking weird." I'd probably go with it. He's just that hot.
She yelled "taste the gay rainbow" in a biker bar. She's either brave or fuckin stupid.
things were going awesome until jimmy put out a cigarette in the everclear.
strip vodka pong is never a good idea. I saw into his colon when he picked up the ball off the floor
I don't think tits should taste like fish.
You know it's been a rough week when you funnel beers by yourself.
I don’t mind that he’s uncircumcised. It’s the fact that he talks about the Bible immediately after we have sex .
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