Uhhh...do I owe you any money? Or an apology? Or anything?
he just said he'd buy the porn
its a step up from the last guy
Im starting to think including a smiley face in texts may or may not be a code for 'lets have sex'
Im going to research this theory. . .
i just bought ciggarettes using my court citation as id. I've reached an all time low.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She ordered a salad and a budweiser. I love her.
I just saw a girl in Albersons in spandex and curlers buying PBR. Only PBR.
how in the hell can u get pulled over when ur car is parked.
guess who's eating a vending machine cheese danish, has no panties on, and is still the classiest bitch at this bus stop?
Last night I had sex with one of the groomsmen I was in the wedding with. In a stairwell. 13 years my senior. Thinking I should retire from the bridesmaid gig.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
"Just cut me in half. Then take half of me home. And leave the other half here. Cuz I can't see."
Some crack addled fool from the sketch ass motel behind the restaurant just gave me a flyer for an AA group when I was on my smoke break. I don't do mornings
I'm standing up, for my all my brothers and sisters, and fighting against whiskey dick.
Is eating a dinner of fishsticks and gin mean you're failing at adulthood? I'm asking for a friend.
The laundromat is nothing like In the pornos
will you help me invent vagina-safe pop rocks?
Randomize