I think I sharted a yagerbomb.
Every time you buy a sobe you buy a bong.
make sure you eat your skittles last so when you barf you can barf RAINBOWS.
I'm glad you enjoy my eating disorder so much.
He tried to blame not having a condom on the economy.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
after we had sex he went grocery shopping. at 6 am. i've never been more confused in my life
I woke up to her staring at me in a corner moaning over and over again about how good the pie crust tasted
Think of it this way, instead of a puppy, we're getting a baby.
I dont think I should be allowed to pick my own boyfriends anymore
They shouted last call and the guy next to me and I looked each other up and down and went in unison "yup, you'll do"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You sucked a guys dick who's name was Chad and that wasn't a sign that it was a bad idea?!
Nothing says "I Love you" like my dick in a pizza box
You should feel special! You're also the only person I've ever punched during sex
I just got a robo call from the Addiction Help Line. Not sure how to take that.
I want a dick in my left hand and a Crunch Wrap Supreme in my right hand.
Did my dad just see you doing a walk of shame?
Yup I waved.
Randomize