Big sunglasses are the new paper bag
ya. and they're way easier to confince girls to wear during sex
They have edible shot glasses at target.
There really is a God.
There was a gay guy in drag passed out against the wall but we had sex in there anyway.
What i love about my dog is i can lay in bed and masturbate with him at the foot, and he just leaves me alone.
I mean we don't talk anymore but I still see him around wearing that sweater he stole from me after we had sex
So I told him "To answer your question yes I am naked making pizza pops in your kitchen"
Oh I fucked him, definitely. We played Strip Halo.
Woke up in a cemetery. Puked in front a funeral ceremony that was going on.
Drink water, eat food, and stop tazing yourself
he kissed both of us goodnight when we dropped him off...I didn't know if I was more offended or impressed
Masturbated while waiting for my face mask to dry, so it was a productive night.
A drag queen just ate a dollar out of my ass. I don't know which one of us has hit rock bottom
Makes hanging out interesting when she lights you on fire just to roll ontop of you to 'put you out'.
I don't see why I have to pay for it.
your head went through the window, you're pretty much obligated to pay for it.
So apparently my bro is going to make me fix his tattoo this trip... He sent me a pic of said tattoo. Tattoo is of a sperm, on his penis, which was in a woman's mouth... Wth
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