But, the reference to being horny and then blending a banana is troubling
I'm taking child development now so if you get pregnant i can raise your child no worries
what part of covering your puke with shaving cream seemed like a good idea?
He told me to pretend to be a shark, and he would slay me with his harpoon cock.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I bought a zebra print bikini, I'm gonna be honest here- if he doesn't want to have sex with me in this, he's gay.
Ive been home for 20 minutes and I'm already in bed with a vodka tonic
u kept pointing at random guys and making quacking or mooing sounds.
I need a leash, or some shame. Maybe.
I'm on my "fiiiiirrrst" glass of wine- the quotes mean it's the last of the bottle- so I really need you to pick up your phone so we can talk about this
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Also, I imagined that his bacne was bubblewrap and that made it much more tolerable
Listen I know you hate her for what she did but this is getting our of hand. Please please tell me where you hid her wedding dress.
you taught an eight year old how to shotgun a half pint of chocolate milk, that's all i'm saying
Everything was cool till you started pissing while standing at the bar
Just saw a girl I banged wearing a pro life shirt downtown. Not sure where to start with that.
He had a tattoo of the Batman logo around his asshole. I noped right the hell out of there.
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