The guy i fucked last week got done first on the test in my 900 person class. If im pregnant at least it will be smart.
ENDLESS SCROLLING ON TUMBLR WAS MADE FOR HIGH PEOPLE!
just threw up on my speech test, so much for a great semester
That's what you get for fucking someone nicknamed "wiggle worm"
as we waited for a manager to come open the door that we broke while having sex on the wall, we decided to go round two in the hallway before he came back.. god i love hotels.
he tried to breastfeed my turtle
i'm not entirely sure that 'not getting kicked out of the bar until it got dark' really classifies as 'doing better'
We don't have sex anymore. We both agree that the olympics are more important to watch. All day. Also i don't look good compared to the athletes...
Note to self don't stop having sex during an earthquake! I call it a 6.1 orgasm!
So, got kind of drunk last night, made out with some guy, and somehow stole his credit card. Don't even know.
I might volunteer to give breath samples on the 17th where I would be required to get drunk and then give samples! THE POLICE WOULD PAY ME AND PROVIDE THE ALCOHOL!
Step 1: Buy a house Step 2: Turn bedroom into sex dungeon
I'm a stupid stupid woman who is totally going to rock this holiday season dick drunk on that Ginger
she's pretty fucking smug for someone who has had unprotected sex with a convicted felon
Shes the whorey leader of that wolf pack, and all the less whorey wolves report back to her. She teaches them the ways
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