i wish i could swallow nair and shit it out and it would get rid of all my ass hair.
We should make a goal to do one active thing a day, even if its like throwing a ball
And by ball i mean playing catch. Beer pong does not count as an activity
He's a navy seal. He can stick it anywhere he wants.
Man, i was looking at the pictures i took last night in one i was on the Kentucky line fist pumping with a hobo..wth happened?
I really want to throw this drink in your face but it was 6 dollars that shits expensive
After everything you did, you followed it with "Oh God, that's something a high person would do. But I'm not high." So yeah, you're not getting near my stash again.
We got way too high so we're sitting in the parking lot of the movies trying to figure out what bar to go to
You have more time for sex than anyone I know.
good news: i got laid. bad news: by your boyfriend
Welp. June's off to a great start. I just ripped my pants, completely sober, at 10:30 p.m.
Lol for real, I'm Kylie Jenner "this is my year of realizing things" right now
It happend again, swimming on the floor... Vodka is my friend
No, I barely made it home last nite. Kept telling cab driver I live across the street from Susan Sarandon?? Thank god her coop addy is posted online.
Why do my weekends always degenerate into using my little brothers childrens board games for drinking games?
I feel a blackout coming on
Plz don't have me burst into your house saying you're late for re airport to rescue you from a fat girl again
That was 2 times
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