just to let you know I saw you texting some Kim chick, and facebook saying she's ugly... good job you're gay now
What I dont get about To Catch a Predator is who the fuck still uses chat rooms?
47 days without vaginal penetration. Im pretty sure it's grown over.
Do you realize that if your cunt was a missing person it would be assumed dead?
so would me posting the photos of the cock and coin jar incident be completely out of the question?
you handed the cop a condom last night and said "it's all about protect and serve right?"
I'm making celebratory pizza rolls. They're a lot like regular pizza rolls, but without the taste of shame.
I just masturbated to the audio from my psych lecture . . . this screwing my prof fantasy is getting serious.
I wish I had a "puke in your car" emoticon
I'm pretty sure I just woke up to one of the airport janitors saying that she wanted to tie me up and do something.. I couldn't hear what, thank god
it was good sex until i became a rubber doll and he became a jack hammer, so i guess overall it was good
Okay I know I said I was going to quit drinking for a while but apparently pumpkin pie flavored vodka is a thing and I will not rest until I have some.
I met my future husband in an elevator. Think Hispanic version of Dr. Bunsen Honeydew from the Muppets, but with eyes like Michael Fassbender.
Just watched my first Christmas porn of the year. Def have the spirit now
My dry spell starts kindergarten this fall...
They grow up so fast.
We had sex and then ordered pizza after. This relationship is looking good so far.
Randomize
