if socks could get pregnant i would have catholic amounts of kids
YOURE GIVING A BLOW JOB TO THE BOY WHO SAYS "OH SNAP"
just woke up with an anonymous loaf of bred in my bed and a piece in my mouth. this says alot about my life.
Its mothers day and I have choke marks around my neck. Thanks for that.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
slowly transforming into a stationary lump of steel. how can you tell me that was JUST weed
just as they were cutting his pants off he made em stop & said "everyone knows about shrinkage right".
He stopped in the middle of us having sex and asked "is today Monday?" then went even faster
Doing a circuit workout and using a power hour playlist for my 1 minute timers. I am getting old. creative, but old.
Did you go to church in Texas and sign me up?
You need southern Jesus
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I went to McDonald's this morning still half drunk with penises drawn all over my body, when my card was declined the cashier asked if I needed Jesus
They sleep with other people as long as there is no oral. Logic and reason were thrown out the window a long time ago with them.
Please hurry. I'm the only one here who's not an attorney with a trophy wife.
Heeyy... sorry I got so drunk. You probably don't ever want to see me again. Thank you for dealing with me when I tried to jump over the deli counter for some mayonnaise.
He texted me at 4:30 in the morning saying "I'm not drunk but I think you're beautiful" and then a facebook message at 6 am saying "hi" and the subject was "oh"
IDK if she's gay or not, but there is something about the way she looks at me that says "do dirty dirty things to me." I have no choice but to oblige.
Randomize