Two people in the coffee shop I'm at are on a date and talking about how acid has affected them and the girl just mentioned meth. Fuck studying, this just got interesting.
Everytime I see a couple on campus walking and holding hands I just want to yell he's gonna lie!
He's currently rapping every word to 'more money more problems' at what could be a over 30s gay bar. I'm not sure yet. More info to come.
We tried to break her futon, I crushed my balls instead. You have one less reason to be jealous that my balls are insanely huge and yours are not.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We just had a sexually tense moment where we both chose the trough the pee. I love gay clubs.
Thoughts of banging the girl who just opened my beer with her teeth?
Let me tell you the story of bicurious george
My wife climbed on top of me, fucked my brains out, and gave me money from the ATM. I'm living the dream.
Apparently fireball doesn't mix well with my no carb diet
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We used to bone, but now she's my life coach.
There's a possibility I may have hooked up with that British guy...
Possibility? You left the door open! Everyone saw!
I guess it's part of life. Sometimes your ex boyfriend becomes a drag queen.
Also apparently I made a "cake sandwich"--yeah smashed a massive piece of cake between two slices of bread....fucking tequila
The frequency with which I change my vibrator batteries is getting a little ridiculous....
It's like a donut of clothes around a pair of heels. Like they were transported to another dimension naked.
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