Small penises have feelings too.
I must have had a great time last night.. I woke up with coconut oil all over my glasses
my lips still taste like vagina
so you liked breakfast?
ehh, still wish we woulda went to IHOP instead
I just beat off to a cartoon porn video. what has my life come to
the people next to us in line are buying a 12 pack and a snuggie
the maid of honor just got in a fight with the mother of the bride at a gas station across the street. best. wedding. ever.
sometimes when i'm drunk i choose the spanish option on the ATM to challenge myself.
i just had to hear from a third party that he came inside of me
She grabbed both of our dicks in the pool then said repeatedly, "this is my dream, this is my dream,"
He just said his penis sings like Mariah Carey...Im going with drunken.
I can't believe you didn't come out. There was a duckling ON THE BAR!
WE HAD GREAT SEX AND I HATE MYSELF FOR IT
I just remember banging him and then at some point I went and took a shower and went and laid in the closet
Go makeout with Mickey Mouse so we can get FastPass tickets
Jk probs not coming. Tequila
Randomize
