is it bad that the only reason i knew what antidote meant in class today, was from years of playing pokemon?
do people in england often walk their sheep on leashes? or is this guy the exception to the rule?
the semester is winding down: time to procrastinate by googling cheap keg options
Somewhere out there, someone is getting laid. And then theres me, watching Star Trek porn while my roommate plays World of Warcraft next door
I just woke up to me licking the dognuts
You mean Doughnuts?
......No :(
Is it bad that now when i read ingredients in the food I eat i only read it as shrooms instead of mushrooms ?
I decided to buy a keg of Miller Lite instead of paying the electric bill. Just thought I'd give you a heads up...
We decided to cut you off after you insisted on eating peanuts by the dumpster
all i remember is him tryin to explain to the girls how to effectively hit the strip club with their bfs
hes actually pretty persuasive when he drinks
I'm eating Doritos that I crushed up n put in a cup so I only have to chill minimally.
tell me why they applauded then the bartender locked himself in the bathroom when i walked into the bar today ????
I actually bought food at McDonald's as an apology for what I was about to do to their bathroom.
He made me twerk for scrambled eggs... I regret nothing
You seriously don't remember crying about how much you miss your mom right before we hooked up?
You're my best friend, so I'm kinda scared to say this, but.....I kinda feel odd when I show up with you at your family events and I have banged or blown at least 3 people in the room
Randomize
