R and i have drinken 4 bottles od red wine. By ourselfs
this kid down the hall keeps banging on his drums...i feel like i'm living in jumanji
shes got a really nice body. but her face is eh.
you dont need a face to have sex
It's like you don't even want to get drunk with me everyday, anymore.
How do you feel about fucking me quick and then me leaving to go do arts and crafts?
javelin tossed one of my crutches in to the mosh pit at the concert, hit some dude in the temple hahah fuck him he sucks
Before he comes over remember the house standards. Ask yourself "will he stalk my sister or myself in the future?". If the answer is yes, then no, he isn't allowed.
Fuck man, my Dad's been single so long I get him a year's sub to a porn site every year for for Father's Day
My gynaecologist hit my g-spot today by accident and for some reason I went "at least someone found it" VERY AWKWARD
So I just bought e from my sophomore home ec teacher. How's your weekend going?
We could have mediocre awkward sex or mediocre stunted/awkward/uncomfortable banter. The possilities are relatively finite
Also I ordered a dildo and I'm not sure if I want it still, so there might be a free dildo in your future
Idk, but the girl in his story had really nice eyebrows and was singing The Climb. How about you CLIMB the fuck away from my man
FORGET THE EYEBROWS
He was cute in a Sketchy-trying-to-sell-you-a-vaccum-at-9-at-night kinda way.
Been smoking since 4. The inevitable finally happened: I bought a cheesecake.
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