No one appreciates an amoeba in a balloon hat.
Hahaha, sighhhh...I texted him to no response. It's a shame, really...I would gladly exchange my body for pizza rills.
Wedsnesdays are always enlightening. Tonights revealation: One should not smoke from something taller than their person.
Just did free shots of tequila at a walmart. Hello Mexico
she works at a police station now. i think thats the definition of keeping your enemies closer.
I really super glued a paper bow tie to my body last night. I need to do less drugs.
Apparently "he pulled out..mostly" is not a valid reason for thinking there's no way i can be pregnant to the nurses at the student health center.
There's a really old guy here with a really young girl. I'm guessing he has to make choo choo train noises to get his dick in her mouth.
i turned my shower on this morning and passionfruit pulp came out. how did you even do that?
i hope youre ready for a shit show because we just ordered a whole pitcher of red headed sluts
Some daaay... Bet your bottom dollar that some daaay you'll do that mollyyyy
I'm mortified. After he finished, he turned to me and said,"So, what did you think of my mom?" WTF Please tell me he was not wondering about that while he was going down on me!!!
I'm cool with a hey old buddy how have you been want to fuck me in the butt kind of thing
I had a dream last night that I used a condom when I had sex. That's how I knew it was a dream
As long as there is beach, drink, dick, in that order. I’m in.
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