me and ur bf were arguing about whether coke was vegan. i really hope it's vegan
it's one of those mornings where you are proud of yourself just for waking up.
I literally stabbed myself so I had a valid reason to get out of having sex with her
i chipped my tooth tryin to cut thru her pantyhose. that stuff is bulletproof.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Said he made a playlist for taking a shit. only two songs on it are the Star Wars theme and "America, fuck yeah" set to repeat.
Ahhh November 1st. National Untagging Day
OK! No more randoms over for the next month this is the third fucking time I caught a naked dude drinking my OJ in the middle of the night.
I wore granny panties last night to ensure I didn't sleep with him. He said they made me seem more mature. I need a new plan
She came to class yesterday wearing a shirt saying Maybe Partying Will Help. Showed up to class today and puked three times.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm not even pretending to study anymore. I'm straight up sleeping in the library
haha all our friends are at the carnival and I'm on stage dry humping a 40 year old
So many weird people in this class. I can practically taste their unwanted virginities. They taste bad.
She has also never texted me first which I think might be a tell-tale sign she wants me to die alone.
Was i rolling around in a parking lot last night
not sure what stings more, my ass or my pride...
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