I mean we're not committed. He's my first choice, sort of like miller lite. When I'm at the bar I'm going to order one, but if they don't maybe I'll go for a bud or blue moon. I'm certainly not going to stop drinking
There's a guy at this party taking all the unfinised beers and pouring them into a pitcher so he can drink them tomorrow.
Woke up on the floor with my glow stick in one hand & dollar bills in the other. Good. Morning.
He burnt a smiley face into the screen with a cigarette, peed in my tub and then tried to take off his pants. tried...
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We fucked in my basement while hiding from the cops.. And now his Facebook picture is him and others holding up there MIP's in front of my house.. I feel obligated to add him as a friend.
Do you knowwwwww you never ha to pee while lhr on eztacy
My only objective is to get drunk enough to forget the last 364 days.
I would have done it. But then again I am a starving student who can manipulate my brain into thinking my decision was somehow morally justifiable.
OH AND DAN PET MY CAT WHILE I WAS GIVING HIM HEAD
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
if i can hear my landlord's phone ring you think be can hear my vibrator?
This text constitutes a formal request for sexual congress under the terms of our Relationship Agreement.
I woke up just like any other Wednesday. Naked on the floor, hungover and covered head to toe in lube
I woke up at 5am on my couch, naked, with a cereal bowl of water next to me. Apprently, drunk me thought I was a kitten last night. Super impressed I slept next to the bowl all night and didn't spill a drop.
Ugh. My life is a never ending cycle of bad decisions and taquitos.
You cuddled up under the blanket because you said it smelled like Santa and vodka.
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