we need to go to the store. i'm tired of having bud light for breakfast.
do you want me to pick up budweiser instead?
I realized courtney is my jiminy cricket but instead of preventing me from telling lies she prevents me from fucking strangers
96 perecent sure i just took a shower with socks
Making the executive decision for drunk you to not sleep in the lofted bed that has no ladder
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You were fucking on a porch at a party, not much privacy should be expected
sleazy september. first one with mono loses.
PSA: Morning booty calls are no longer accepted after the hours of 6am when I've been drinking or before 11am when I have not. Your cooperation is appreciated.
I just saw an appointment in my phone called "it's been a month" I think I drunkly did that after I slept with Paul to remind myself to check if I got knocked up... I'm smarter drunk than sober.
I think this girl gave me a handjob thinking that I would help her with her cell phone bill
omg. that's awesome
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Also, any YOLOwl-related sex photos will result in you winning ten orgasms, courtesy of myself, as well as sweets and bacon-based dinner. All entrants welcome
And they have kittens that decided that boobs are apparently the best arena for king of the hill...
Of course I understand. Thou shalt never turn down a free meal or drink. It's one of the commandments of being a girl.
Seeing your boyfriend, side piece, and great white buffalo, all in one night? Its a sign right?
Proceed with caution.
Napping in front of family members can be embarrassing when you get a christmas boner in your sleep
no its a draw, weve been through this, when were keeping score on getting laid i get a plus 1 handicap each week because of your British accent! its only fair!
Randomize