I mean a good dj is a huge turn on
You drunk dialed me talking about the stages of mitosis. There is no way you didn't ace your bio final
I almost masterbated to the avatar love scene ha it was so hot
These hangoverless Sunday mornings are becoming too regular.
I know this request is pointless but you two please try to keep the drinking and drug use to a minimal, I have bail money so write my number on your arm and a "if found call", wear a life jacket and act like a responsible 28 year old please.
I feel like strippers are like dogs, the more you show you're terrified the faster they come at you.
work has become about six times more interesting since i started fucking my boss.
I woke up and the only 2 bowls I own were shattered on my floor. Pretty sure my hand and tailbone are broken and I have no idea what the fuck happened
stop fucking thinking about him when there is A MILLION OTHER PENISES TO RIDE IN THE WORLD
all I got out of honors convocation is I've hooked up with a lot of smart guys
I'm at a first year old's birthday party and a midget dressed as a cop just showed up. Word is we're going to toss and bowl with him. Updates to come.
Its official. The summoning powers of my vagina are unmatched by anything in this world
I'm sober now, I ate a whole cantaloupe.
I miss you and I miss your weed. Come home.
I want to disappear from this job like a fart in the wind.💨
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