I wish I could get plan B off e-bay so it would be a secret and cheap.
He deserves to hear about your Vagina Shrooms
just saw your exgirlfriend at the mall. her sister is pretty hot.
called that a week into the relationship. like driving off the lot with a 2010 and seeing the 2011 models coming in on the truck.
just ran into my gynecologist at the liquor store... i think she's found the source of my problems
my fake id says im a 34 yr old russian lady ... how is this working
I have to fuck proof my bed. It was in the middle of the room this time.
They asked if I was about to puke and my response was to laugh and suddenly throw up. Continuing my asshole streak I kept laughing while still vomiting.
He whinnies like a horse when he's cumming. I wish I would have known this before we got into a relationship.
Bro I am trying to have one night stands nothing more, unless she is baking waffles I can eat out of her butthole I am not interested
I've been here 20 minutes and a sweaty naked man has kissed me on the cheek.
Some male strippers are here, I threw pancakes at them. It's ok
Come on kid, foreplay is elementary stuff. It's a vagina, not a sphinx.
Is there one of me peeing? If so do I look bangable in it
I can't. I mean he's hot, but there's really nothing else there
You just said he's hot
NO YOU DON'T UNDERSTAND
Being pregnant feels like you have a hangover everyday.. Don't listen to what anyone says about how wonderful it is
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