After that we used the in-room hotel coffee pot to warm up some queso. it was brilliant
I mean I found and stalk his moms facebook.. that obsessed.
I don't have enough holes for all these australians
I left puerto rico a week ago and my vagina still smells like coconut.
Last time I get high to write a paper the night before it's due. "Tiny Wings and sexuality" is not an acceptable topic to for a paper. Class in 30 minutes. I'm fucked...
uh, 3 redbulls and 400mg of caffeine pills and i still feel like life is in slowmotion..lets not take tranquilizers again.
I texted him that I wanted to be more than fuck buddies so when I came over he gave me a punch card. He takes me I dinner every 10 fucks.
I posted her number in the m4m casual encounters area of Craigslist.
I guess her always saying "gay men love me!" will finally get put to the test.
So a guy died and our dates revived him with CPR. Good night?
I am the only person I know ever to have been brought TO the bar in the back of a cop a car. Twice.
They made up a new version of "Smash or Pass" called "I would(n't) let you sit on my face" to yell at the freshman
I had a dream last night that I answered the phone and after I said hello, Shia Lebeouf started yelling "DO IT! JUST DO IT!" That's when I knew, I had officially become meme trash.
Now that you have a boyfriend, can I have my vibrator back?
I need to align my fucking chakras
This is why I can't take dates to shows... I've literally made out with everyone in this band. And two of the guys in the crowd. And the bartender.
Randomize
