she left her pants. im pretty sure she grabbed mine on accident. im like 9 man sizes bigger than her. wtf
You work out of a Hotel?
So when exactly did I get naked and makeout with the statue?
Can I sleep on your couch? My wife just found my eHarmony account.
This beer is not sobering me up at all
but you must be fair and judge his penis by normal penis standards and not let your vision be clouded by the rare gem of a penis you have recently encountered
and lets be real... who can blow a middle school class's sunday school teacher and keep a straight face ever again? NOBODY.
The Deck is crawling with Cougars. Sound the irresponsibility alarm and come drink with me on a Tuesday night.
He picked up a chick with a line about the price of used cars in Sri Lanka and developing economies. Step it up.
So this is completely apropos of nothing, but I have a feeling that a friend of mine might be a good match for you. Can I set you two up on a date? Oh, and it seems that we live a block away from each other and aren't having sexy times. This is ridiculous. By the way, there's a chance that I might be a tad drunk. Still though, there's a very *good* chance that you and Mr. X would get along.
Can I use your baby to go shoplifting?
just passed my midterm while getting a blow job. i love going to school online
First he fixed my gutter. Then he flogged me and fucked me. Then he bought me a new vacuum cleaner. I don't understand Daddy Dom stuff but I ain't mad at it.
I'll keep supplying drugs if you teach me piano.
He has to be employed and covid free. That’s my standard. I can’t be picky. 2020 has killed my sex life.
Randomize
