I solve my problems like an adult, at the strip club drinking on a work night.
kristin has been a bad kristin
Tip #47, don't trim the bush when you have the shakes!
we ate a 40 pack of string cheese and watched an entire washing machine cycle.
That still doesn't explain why you thought it was a good idea to paint a cow on my guitar
You better be watching. There will be a POP quiz. Each correct answer gains you 5 more minutes of the sexual act of your choice
He sent me a pic of his Junk. He said it was a Brett Farve valentine.
Which is worse rug burn on your nipples or laying there after wondering how long you have to cuddle before you can sneak away?
There's a middle eastern man wearing a cow costume with tequila coming out of his udders, but I'm not sober enough to feel uncomfortable with it.
How do you say "get out of my apartment" in Spanish. No time to explain, just tell me.
I have no idea. There are 6 asians singing hey soul sister to me right now.
don't care how drunk i am. my dick was like "nope, not doing it, you can't make me and i was like oh yes i can"
Maybe is for pussies. We only say yes in this household
so i was about to call you for your birthday but then i started making out with this guy... and i feel bad but i felt like you'd understand
Who knew removing piercings would be so radical?
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