I got my period while he was fingering me , I knew it because I never get that wet.
Did u at least say sorry?
this is probably the only time in my life that i would want to fuck thomas jefferson
we fucked while standing on a ladder. challenging, but worth it.
i didn't realize we were even dating until i ran out of weed
He rubs his penis on back when he think I'm sleeping
just remembered spooning on the cardboard and confessing to each other we had the spins.
Accidentally gagged on my toothbrush and puked up a Walgreen's cheeseburger. 1) I am not going to be on top of my game tonight. 2) Since when do I have a gag reflex? 3) Walgreen's cheeseburgers are awesome.
He's just giving off this "someone be a bitch to me" vibe
I would rather you cheat on me then you watch this season of Breaking Bad without me.
First thing that comes on in the morning is kanye's I can't hold my liquor. yeezus lives.
I found out my butt plug has a metal core at the airport security checkpoint...
We were getting fries and you hopped the counter and yelled "WELCOME TO GOOD BURGER HOME OF THE GOOD BURGER" and threw up
Whenever someone tells me they've never met a bisexual, I feel like a majestic fucking unicorn.
We just catapulted a jelly bean off of his hard dick into his mouth.......Happy Easter!
Ahha guy saw me buying beer, went "hmmmmm" and nodded his head approvingly. No words exchanged, but he has made his way to my heart haha
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