I just wanted to let you know that if you dont tell me to stop texting i will still keep on trying, you matter to me
restraining order is on its way, crazy bitch
two pink lines on a pregnancy test is bad, isn't it?
only if you didn't want to fuck up your life.
You broke her grandpas urn and ran your hand through his ashes claiming it was pixie dust. I think thats why shes mad at you..
mondays should just be called national damage control day
We just watched planet earth in marine bio. And our prof told us that was all we were doing on 420
The sign in front of ihop says "designated drivers get half off their order"
Lmao the neighbor heard yall last night She wanted me to tell you way to finish strong
there is no excuse for drinking mascato in your room alone while listening to one-hit wonders from the 90s
SIMBAAAA REMEBER WHO YOU ARE
Pictures of drunk me in a bike helmet are like McDonald's collectible toys. There's sooo many, but NO ONE has seen all of them.
I mean I sucked his dick at 3 AM... UNDERWATER. I think I have earned a follow back on twitter.
Who knew wearing a toga outside would provide for and infinite amount of dick to choose fron
I just had to explain why I ate a whole quart of mac and cheese before 8am. Not a good start to the day
Its a shame I cant put 'bomb ass head game' on my resume.
Girl. There is no more toilet paper. You should have seen the twerking I just did to shake the pee off.
Randomize
