Would it be quicker to bike the freeway home?
Would you rather have a 10 inch but pencil thin penis or a 2 inch very fat one?
Fat, it's not about touching the bottom it's about raising hell of the sides.
So she said she wears a diaper when she's on her period and I'm not going to lie, I kind of want to see the diaper.
At least drunk you showered before switching sex partners last night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hey. Can you be so hung over that you get a rash?
It was just a reflex. BOOM I kicked her in the face
if you do the accent, i'll wear the eyepatch
It was kinda hard to explain to his wife why there was chocolate syrup on the ceiling.
All I know is....there's beer in my camera. How do I know? Because I can pick up my camera,shake it and HEAR, the beer in it
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So the next time I call you and say I'm going to my first strip club because it's christmas eve eve, and have work the next morning, I'd appreciate you stopping me
apparently when we were gone the parents play strip connect 4
The part where he comes over and ignores you isn't what makes me mad about that story... It's the fact that he ate your tacos, AND THEN proceeded to ignore you. That's cold hearted.
the night literally screamed "cock and ball torture"
i was so high when i left this morning that rather than make sandwiches i threw bread and peanut butter in my backpack. a whole loaf. and a whole jar
Fuck you. All I remember from last night is telling random people that I'm in a "judgement free zone" then I threw up
Randomize