the next pure michigan commercial i see, i am going to pee in a fucking lake
apparently i peed in my fridge last night because my vegetable drawer was filled with it.
so i just calculated it and i would need to score 150% on this final to pass
he's listed in a fb relationship with a girl born in 1993. i'm too drunk to do the math on that one, but i am sober enough to know that's illegal
Ya bro it was wild. Hey, is latex digestible?
Regular drunk falling on flat ground did not prepare me for drunk falling into a pile of firewood.
I'm sick of being the only unemployed member of the group. Doing things alone isn't partying. Its sad.
One step ahead. Always. Roses are red, violets are blue... I'm gonna fuck you with a rake.
Every time I there's a break up, I'm left with an animal. That's it. No more mutual pets.
I climbed out a window to pee last night because i thought i was locked in the room... Then crawled back in and went to bed. The poor neighbors.
My flask has coffee in it for finals week.. So that's responsible right?
so i woke up at six am and his bathroom was flooded. i think i fucked shit up in my sleep.
It's amazing what a couple of orgasms can do for a girls demeanor.
I like the new guy, he keeps beer in the fridge.
Just once, can I please come back to a room that doesn't smell like beer and cum?
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