when I scratched it gently some sort of watery looking stuff came out...so then I just stopped thinknig about it.
Oh my god he is having a sentimental moment right now.
He just sent me like a really heartfelt confession of love in which he ended with "make the apt, I'll hold your hand while you get your clit pierced."
It's offcial there's a Bobby Light radio station on pandora.
Everything tastes like Lysol. Am I dying?
Okay, quick math test. If our entire group can do at least 6 shots a night, how much alcohol will be needed to keep us shit faced for the rest of the week? This is for a grade. Anddd, go.
As we're eating sushi she goes I just want to get a disease so my mom can take care of me... Great first date
I mean, two foreign guys have drunkenly confessed their love for her, so she's clearly doing something right.
She mentions her boyfriend one more time, I'm taking her home and breaking that shit up.
My liver is whispering mean things about me to my kidneys. It's a fucking miracle I'm not hungover. Lol
WHO ARE THESE GUYS WHY AN ORGRY ON A MONDAY LMAO
I feel like I might be the only person I know who eats bundles of radishes in-between orgasms from their vibrator.
Also, you think turning 23 is bad, I just ran into the guy that gave my chlymidia
I can't believe it is only 1:30...I may have to stab myself with scissors for an excuse to go home...
Just a little. Like do I say "hey I'm the girl that's fucking your son, nice to meet you"
I've broken 3 vibrators in the past month because I apparently am "too rough" with them. Is that even possible?!
Randomize
