I keep pulling short curlies out of my mouth. Not cool
She better not be too drunk to operate a blowtorch
and now there are teeth marks on my dick.
1.) where are you? 2.) you making meatballs? 3.) Meatballs for sex?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You called me at 4am shouting drunk shit about Poland and asking me to 'come out and play.' Where the fuck were you?
Poland
I hope you enjoy this collage I made of you and me getting fucked up together
Awee what are you going to name your new dog?
What dog?
You told me you had two boobs that want to be naked for me. I'm just following up on your request.
wearing the bible to the ABC party, thought you'd appreciate that.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I guess I'll just chalk it up as a learning experience and a lot of great sex.
I'm also sorry that I ate your chicken sandwich while you were throwing up....
When she said "Tighten your safety belt and hold on!", that should have been a clear sign to me that one should never go off-roading in a rental car. On the bright side, they were able to tow her car out the next morning.
I'm a grown ass woman, I need to get fucked
I can't hang out with this penis. I'll start thinking I like the person it belongs to.
I am a unicorn in a field of flowers, you asshole.
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