The guy dancing on me has three visible teeth. WHERE ARE YOU?
So I pulled my t-shirt down, pushed my boobs up and marched right into that church!
i'm sending her a home depot gift card for the hole i put in her wall. call it good?
do you think they make "congratulations unfit mother" greeting cards?
or abortion recommendation cards.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
True friendship; bangin a girl to get ur friends hat back
It was mandatory to shotgun a beer before we were allowed to eat dinner
It's so cute when the exchange student uses "blowjob" as a verb.
I slept with him to see his dog one last time
Jenny was looking for something soft to drink since it's only noon, she chose spiced rum. Think she might die today
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
the story is to long to tell you via txt so when you notice the tattoo on your ass call me.
My attorney has my name in her roldex as need to hit that. Im gonna win my case
Nah it's alright, I'll just ride cock all the way to hell
I literally JUST MADE IT to the liquor store. I bought a box of wine with the lights off
can you take a pic of your glorious tits but not send it just yet? I need motivation to finish this bull shit presentation.
We saw the mini basketball hoop and unicycle and just knew we had to create a new sport
Drunk minds think alike
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