ok so the lil girl sitting behind u was picking the hairs off ur sisters back and putting them in her mouth
youre totally missing out on eating your boogers right now. my entire face is numb
just wokeup with my ethics textbook on my chest, animal crakers in my mouth and my dick in my hand. even aristotle doesn't have a theory for this one
Nothing on google about my condom issue. However, if you get a chance google: condom with teeth.
the fact that you could barely do more than slur incoherent sentences didn't stop you from correcting her grammar
It all boils down to, who else do we know that is willing to buy our friendship?
mind if i send you a dick pic? so you can see what she wasn't doing right?
I threw up sweet potatoes. Worst thing to throw up ever. They came back mashed.
There are several different types of life sentences in my purse right now.
I was told my cock was a religious experience.
I don't know what happened. His phone, shirt, shoes, and the condom wrapper are here but he isn't. I don't even know how to get a hold of him right now
Yeah, but having a dick this size has ruined 3 marriages.
How's moving going?
Uh, we're on the way to the store to buy more booze
Nothing like ripping open the box with your keys on a sat R train and throwing back the morning after pill with some coconut water on my way to work at a fitness studio for free
I'm just really glad SD weather is so erratic so I can get away with wearing a scarf in May to cover up these hickeys.
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