we are all sexual creatures
yea maybe. but you're not. you're not getting any.
you just love her because she lets you bang her with fruits and veggies!
Phosphoglyceraldehydration... why the fuck is this a word
I had 4 margarita's and 2 mixed drinks and i blew zero's. Its a cinco de mayo miracle.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The freshman next to me just said "I was rocking out on my way here to Dave Matthews..." I wish I would have passed this class the first time.
All of our toilets in my house are broken. Thank God I've practiced peeing in the sink enough.
Its all fun and games until someone grabs the electrical fence.
Do you think they make a "sorry in my drunken debauchery I dropped a pumpkin off the balcony and you happened to be standing right there/get well soon" card?
He asked for a foot job. Whatever. I guess I'm swimming in new slut waters tonight.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
DR UNK TOWN USA
TEAM USA GO AMERICA
But yeah, that is officially the new "I just came" picture
I will show up on your front porch in a wet t shirt and some mac and cheese
I woke up this morning and I had the absolutely horrific realisation that I am the human incarnation of scrappy doo
I'm at my friends house alone, she's at spin class so I'm wearing her engagement ring and eating buffalo wings. It's 9:30am. Happy Valentine's Day.
THE STRIPPER HAD A GUN JOHN!
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