We're pretty sure the 'pocket' aspect of the hot pocket is unnecessary. Testing our theory now.
Dude love is like an itch. You fuckin scratch it, then it itches more, then you scratch it and it itches more, and before you know it, there is semen everywhere.
you are insane
I thought at least he would want to exchange numbers after he tried to put it in my bum
Don't know whats worst me sharding on her a bit or her believing me when i told her she did it...
Grilled cheese is the best thing. ever. better than boys, and alcohol, and sex, and chocolate, and money. But not really the last two.
Well, it's 24 hours till finals. I need high A's on all of them and I still am not sure where exactly on campus most of my classes took place.
I can't even use my hands i'm so hungover
He was eating mac and cheese. Raw. Like as in he was eating the uncooked noodles then pouring the dry cheese in his mouth.
He gave me his business card. It was a Justin Bieber trading card with his number written in sharpie. I have to call him don't I?
he literaly had a hockey helmet on and was swan diving off the couch onto the coffee table.
I just sent an "I'm sorry I forged a prescription in your name" email. It was one of the more awkward things I've done this week.
Dude...are you really going to start sexting during our friend's memorial service?
He told me he loved me...but added "you crazy bitch" at the end. Does it still count???
My theme for the night was drink diego drink! Unfortunately Dora was not there to navigate me to the bathroom
What do you do when you legitimately find a hidden sex dungeon in your parents basement next to your bedroom!!?
Randomize
