yah I made NO friends last night. at one point i think i replaced talking with spitting
Now there are nude photos of that bangin hot Russian spy chick...this is officially the best scandal ever.
I think "banned from Amtrak due to excessive projectile vomiting" would sum up the evening quite nicely.
We were laying in the basement dry humping to the rhythm of the washing machine
She. Own s my pussycat. Roxk it like. The sun hitting the horizon
guy in front of me at the pharmacy just asked the pharmacist for 2 Plan B's and replied with, "If your wondering, then yes I did have a threesome. It was amazing".
Gotcha. Well, I'm puking and trying to keep down water from a mug that says "love the moment" around the rim. Not loving this particular moment.
Did you mean to cry when you finished last night? Or were you just that drunk?
What? My family got wasted on patron and I threw up on my pants and said it was gravy. Hot mess.
You are a lesbian wizard with red hair. You are willow
Guess who just sucked off 1/5 of one direction?
it was also funny because at one point I woke up with my hands tied with a belt and we were both like what the fuck
You gave my cousin a blowjob and are facebook friends with my mom. Is there a name for this level of friendship?
If he refers to me as slump buster one more fucking time.
we had to take 10 shots sometime before midnight, then 11 shots between midnight and 1. so yes its gonna be a rough day.
Randomize
