Being alone has allowed me to flourish into a complete weirdo
Contrary to popular belief, while 19 is an attractive age, it does not equate to sexual prowess.
I'm playing a drinking game with nyc prep. This will not end well for meeee
Everytime the gay dude pretends he's not gay, drink a cosmo. Everytime the crosseyed girl is crosseyed, kill her
McDonalds has hash browns for only a quarter!....how many u want?
All of them
its time to go be "that drunk guy nobody knows"....again.
My body has become completely dependent on Text Twist. I can't poop without it.
Don't bother coming over to clean the mess. I already paid two kids 5 bucks for it, just didn't tell them you peed all over the place. You do owe me 5 bucks though
Some guy thought i was the waitress and handed me his credit card. drinks on me.
I consented to having my finger branded. How was your night?
but im not going to tell the owner of the penis of my dreams how to wear his hair.
So what's going on?
We hit boys town to get stupid. I mean invading Iraq stupid.
Nope I went the fuck home like an adult
after attempting to eat a candy cane bigger than my hand i have determined there's no way to eat this that doesn't seem erotic
beggars cant be choosers....im desperate and he has a dick. he checks all the boxes.
Had to clear my browser history. I figured if she used the search bar and her name came up, it might be a little creepy.
Randomize
