Do u think she knows her nickname is the oompa loompa
Awesome. Ask her out.
Nope. She's got a detail of ed hardy security around her.
Why would I want to inherit a sex machine used by my grandma?
someone just broke into my class and invited everyone to the bar ...now we're filling out a police report. awesome.
I'm sweating while I eat mac and cheese. That fat.
Was I wearing clothes when I handed you your keys. Please tell me I was wearing clothes.
the outcome of this sandwich determines whether or not i do anything else with my day..
It's official. The summoning powers of my vagina are unmatched by anything in this world.
It wasn't a threesome, it was me making out with one while looking at the other one screaming "does this make you jealous?"
They showed a guy on tv in a Brady jersey and a sweatpants boner when the NE offense took the field. They didn't show his face. I hope that wasn't you.
Just start grabbing cocks. It can't go wrong! Just say you thought you knew him and wanted to check.
I made a bet with her that she would show me her tits if I finished my beer. Only on spring break.
HE'S LICKING FROSTING OFF OF THE EIGHTEEN YEAR OLD BOY
I came so hard my ears popped.
You've got the chocolate, drugs and my pants. You hold all the cards...
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