just woke up. wallet empty. bottle empty. tattoo in pen on my arm. smell like bad sex. woke up alone. and wall-e is playing on my computer. need answers.
Those balls look pretty dangerous.
week 6 of class: i have yet to go to spanish sober. i love being THAT girl.
I think their strategy was based on people bein at a beach, seein a rainbow, and havin an orgasm at the same time.
i was laying in her brothers bed, in his old room. and i kept getting the chills. i didn't know if it was a draft or the ghosts of BJ's past.
I asked her to make me water, which in turn meant get me a glass. She handed me a cup of microwaved ice cubes.
You did a line of free coke with an obese Slovenian unlicensed cab driver in the toilets of the most questionable strip club in the country. New low man.
When you put it like that, I'm inclined to agree.
I just threw up every bad decision and it hurts
There are two types of people in this world I don't trust: people who collect stamps, and people who don't drink
The cops walked in and cracked up bec he was passed out on the couch in a pink tutu.
So who won the naked front yard Olympics last night?
Well my tits are spray painted gold & i have what i think r the Olympic rings shaved in my vag !!!!!!!SO its safe to say i won something ....
I just want him to come back from NOLA alive, without an arrest record or stripper glitter on his clothes...
Those seems like unreasonable expectations for a bachelor party honestly...
Not every day do you see a hooker getting arrested at noon. Just kidding, we live in Reno.
Haha, how do I word that nicely? "You got me to the edge of no return twice and failed to let me orgasm, therefore you owe me chicken nuggets or hot wings. Your decision"
I'll be honest, I too would punch the 21 year old version of myself in the face, and then have rough sex with him.
Randomize
