chicago's viagra triangle is not unlike the bermuda triangle in thatt things just get lost...... planes, ships, dignity, virginity, etc.
I tried to take a photo for proof but couldn't hold my penis, camera, and measuring tape all at the same time.
You never know, some chick could have a weird unibrow fetish.
Dude you were sitting on a bench on the street with her for 45 minutes thinking you were on the bus
I will be naked everywhere
I figured it out. If I have at least 4 shots of vodka before I start my day, EVERY day will be a good day.
Her only article of clothing is an American Flag
my roommates tied me up with rope and duct tape then left me outside the door to the hot girls' suite on my floor, knocked on the door and ran away leaving me there with a sign that says free
I thought he was having it in Athens. Alright. Have fun. Please save my dignity and refrain from talking about my boobs and sexual "abilities". If I have any. I just feel like they are going to ask. Repeat after me. And repeat it 5 more times. This is going to be the phrase you're going to rely on tonight: "I can neither deny or confirm such actions."
Everything I own smells like cigarettes and victory right now. The smell is never coming out.
why does CNN give a flying $@*# about the royal baby so, so much?
i hope they name him Joffrey
Weddings might be fun but they are not getting fucked in the wilderness fun.
the best part is that i get to keep the pot plants and he still has my name tattooed on his ass
You were cussing me out in sign language, and slurring your signs.
That's some kind of record drunk there...
I slept like a rock because of your dick. I'll thank him personally later.
Randomize
