But honestly u used to be a cool guy and lately uve been superame(734): Superlame
Those balls look pretty dangerous.
Just saw a guy at the gas station legitimately dressed in exactly what my costume was last night. Fuck his life.
Goodbye hot boy in my geo class...goodbye my lover, goodbye my friend. you have been the one, you have been the reason I came to claassss
I dont think that drinking by ourselves on a saturday night counts as being "fun alcoholics"
Somebody was walking their dog with their car. seriously
He skyped me to learn how to roll a joint and for us to masturbate together. And you said a long distance relationship wouldn't work.
There was a dismembered bleeding penis in my dream last night. That's some serious Freudian shit.
Fucking in bar bathrooms doesn't count as "rushing things"
Personally, if my roommate had a nice friend who made me dinner, gave me free beer, a 4am meal, a couch to sleep on in an apartment on the beach, and breakfast when I woke up, and I found out that said roommate was fucking her, I'd be all... right on! She's cool! Thanks for the quesadillas!
Nothing $200 worth of strippers and spicy fried chicken couldn't fix.
Morning fuck and a coffee. ARE YOU READY TO CONQUER THE GALAXY WITH ME??
I baked a frozen pizza completely, put it back in the plastic and box, and put it back in the freezer. THAT drunk.
You kicked my dad IN THE NUTS right when he walked in.
Sorry, man. Thought he was a cop.
Well guess who isn't a virgin anymore
guess who isnt wearing pants has a shaving cream beard and is afraid theres no cream cheese in the fridge
the answer to that last one was me. the answer to the first one is you, you sly dog
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