why do my parents always seem to be having way more sex than i do?
I'm cheering for the colts this year. I basically have to since my fake says i'm from indianapolis
If a man's penis is referred to as "the family jewels" does that make a woman's vagina a jewelry box?
woke up to an overdrawn credit card. did you order the dawsons creek boxset last night?
i hope so.
29 Frat Parties That Got Way Too Out Of Control
Do you not remember you showing everyone in the bathroom your period stained underwear? I'd say you were pretty happy it came
Someone played tic tac toe on my abs?
ummm i just drove by ur house and ur passed out on the porch. please call me when u get this
I'm such a fucking super-fan. I was worried his cum would wash away his autograph.
Hundreds of bug bites..Dad jokingly says "looks like you passed out naked in the woods somewhere"
15 Ridiculous Ways Broke People Managed to Make a Buck
I am dressed. And we didn't do anything. He's gorgeous and tall tho. Something nice to look at when I'm hungover
Dude. It's not even nine. I don't know yet.
Drink number four. Don't even tell me about its not even nine
Currently siting in the living room naked, staring at one of the girls across the street in her living room naked. This is like the most intense starting contest of all time.
I haven't been motivated enough for a shirt. And only half the day was bra-worthy.
I want to get up and tell you that smells delicious but I'm struggling with the idea of pants
he left a full can of coors light underneath my windshield wiper, like a love note. if that's not husband material, i don't know what is