were you the shorter or taller girl out of you two
i just saw a girl w/ a shirt that said "im the single friend." yeah i bet u r. stop wearing shirts like that and that could change.
So apparently last night I was running around columbus circle station screaming that Obama was a pussy and that "waterboarding should always be an option" lol
so today in my theology class we brought up the proper way to have sex. so rough sex was said by the teacher...I said I know a girl that likes to be choked. sorry but everyone knew it was you
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Have you been tested recently?
Well I got my shots when I was a baby so I think I'm immune
The last thing I remember was paying off her younger brother not to judge me, then puking on his shoes.
I know how to make vodka btw in case you want to come over and do a science project
Day drinking is so dangerous way too many construction workers out there to flirt with
Go big or go home. Or get a live in house boy you met 7 years ago and feel like you have unfullfilled potential. You know, the usual
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We've been watching Scooby Doo and having sex for the past 36 hours, so life is great
I wore sunglasses to take a shower. I might be hungover.
Our lives are a motherfucking joke
After she got off the phone with her mom she sprinted down the block screaming "I'M SO GOOD AT BEING A HUMAN!!!!!!!!!!!!!"
jump out the window naked night went bad
I’m going down on him like an Oompah Loompah on roller skates.
That makes no sense, but good luck
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