She's a black belt cougar in the 6th degree.
Well how sick are u. Ive got a good immune system.
I've decided that my new worst fear is that I'll end up on "I Didn't Know I was Pregnant"
i've never smoked before...when you said wake and bake i thought you meant like a funeral bbq or something
We already established this. No, he did not cum on the dog.
I am sweating out the vodka to make room for the whiskey tonight.
I'm gonna be a few minutes late, some asshole just fell off the ferry so we had to stop.
This drunk girl wants you to know that I do actually like you. I'm not just using you for sex. I think you're cool.
Thank you for caring about my cervix.
I love the fact that my Mom has been present at 90% of my drug deals.
idk man, I was fucked up and eating fried rice at the grocery store, tried to wave at her but she just looked concerned at me.
I'm not finished with being a sloppy white girl alcoholic. I didn't postpone having a husband and kids for sober weekends.
He made a deal with his real estate agent called fucking in 50 properties for sale
Tears For Fears is the only thing getting me through life at this moment.
The only thing I remember about us having sex is yelling at him to choke me.
Randomize
