I enjoyed our heart to heart in the trunk on the way to the stripclub
Totally just locked myself outside of my house, in my robe, with the fedex man and a box of sex toys. Not my week.
College is a time for personal growth. Meaning it's time to start using those pickup lines on randos at dive bars.
i've eaten like 19 popsicles... what the fuck have you done today?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I legit had a 15 minute convo about dinosaurs with a guy at the bar last night cuz he was wearing a jurassic park shirt
My Instagram consists mostly of drag queens and people who dress up as power rangers... I'm pretty sure I'm an unclassified category of gay
somehow this went from sexting to explaining my eating disorder.
People will call it the Wrath of the Froyo. We'll be immortalized.
Everyone here is taking crazy amounts of mescaline and I'm just over here like hey have you tried the pretzel rolls mmm
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
According to my snapchat story, I tore a fake wig off a security guard and ran away with it.
I apparently asked the bartender for a plastic bag and told her I was gunna puke then grabbed two handles from the bar then put the handles in the plastic bag and left.....
It's something you'd find in the room outside of Ben Carson's sex dungeon
It seems that Coffee is the true alpha male.
Sitting across the table from one of my high school teachers who hasn't seen me since I was about 16 drinking a beer wearing a leotard
I dont know. He's too private. After you fuck him find out his secrets.
Randomize