Omg. Just talked to a semi driver from nebraska. Got her truck stuck. Gave her and her riding buddy a glass of vodka and a cig. YES.
I just found out the FDA voted to ban Vicodin, my last connection to this world has been destroyed
Imagine if sharks could walk on land...scary.
I dont have enough money in my bank account to buy a pregnancy test. this wouldnt be the first time ive had to steal one either...
These 23 People Walked In On Someone And Saw Some Crazy Sh*t
Just made a drug deal by throwing my money to my dealers window and receiving weed the same way. We are the definition of typical lazy stoners.
Took his v-card last night. Yet another experience I didn't expect to have in my thirties.
there's another hole in my ceiling...someone fell through the attic this time....
Btw sorry for throwing that bag of ice at your face lastnight....
There's something odd about buying beer for the first time while wearing my school sweater from kindergarten, but I don't mind.
Confessions From 23 People Who Have Been Hiding Terrible Secrets
You just seemed really offended whenever my cup was empty.
His morals are debatable, but his heart or perhaps his penis is in the right place.
His penis is crooked. Right place? Maybe he starts there, but then he slants.
It's funny because every time I go up and down the stairs it's an adventure. A A DRUNK ADVENTURE. PS I ALREADY THREW UP WTF
Stop jerking off to vines my recommended list on YouTube is getting weird.
my roommate woke me up with head. more awkward than it sounds.
Also what’s the official rule on washing one guy’s jizz off my back before I go out with another guy? That I should?