Pride was great cause we really can now appreciate how far we've come as gay people!
Doll, if you're still fucking strangers behind the WeHo Sonic while high on E then we've come as far as 2003...
Is showing up wearing the condom a bit presumptus
We just saw a waitress walk by with a tray of bacardi and whipped cream.
Whoever ordered that deserves a pat on the back and the "classiest customer" award
Where does it all go? I've busted inside of you like 10 times in the last week.
someone just broke into my class and invited everyone to the bar ...now we're filling out a police report. awesome.
How much is that going to cost?
A lot of beer.
I think you have the right to know, the water bottle you drank out of the other night is the bottle we use to catch what drips from the toilet. Love you!
animal crackers drenched in taco bell mild sauce... surprisingly delightful
breakfast of champions
breakfast of stoners
I'm just gonna pretend you didn't ask me that. I'll sweep that shattered moment of our friendship under the shame rug.
Plus my dignity needs a night alone with me.... Oh that's right. I lost it last night
A picture of a damn cupcake brought back 3 fuckboys
I bought a machete, tennis balls, and matches. How is this NOT going to be a great night?
Fuck it, i havent messed around in half a year. I have sexual tension with a fire hydrant.
Can I come over?
Sorry I gave up dick for lent. Hit me up on Good Friday tho
I know you’re not my dad, but you’re someone dad. And you’re also like a second dad to me who I also send nudes to as well. Happy Father’s Day
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