Pappa wants mamma naked
I sware she could use her own nose as a dildo.
I hope my theory books are in my locker, but if not, I guess I can always share with you.
Who said I want to share with you?
You've sucked my dick, I'm pretty sure you don't care if I look at your theory book.
buying booze in bulk is always a bad idea. i wish there was some direct deposit-like system
Slutapocalypse this thursday. Invite every freshieee you hooked up with this semester to my house. Think of it like a meet n greet for them and battle of the sluts for us.
Yeah... I was considering changing that part but the boxed wine is non-negotiable.
I'm sorry I make you whore yourself out to him everytime I'm drunk and want mcdonalds.
Well for starters, her tits were hairy.
Can we make 2014 the year of no unsolicited dick pics?
FUCK and YOU. times 10. To infinity and beyond. You bastard. Worst. Cockblock. Ever. I'm going to nail your sister.
for the record im never blowing a guy on the toilet again, that was sad and degrading
She's the prison bitch to my Martha Stewart.
Honestly it was like 3 AM and I only agreed to go to the strip club because I wanted chicken tenders
I imagine you as a cat holding your burrito with two paws and cutely eating it
I'm starting to notice a direct correlation between blackouts and broken bones...
Randomize
