she says it's "been amazing lately"
i think basically because i hate her so much i'm trying to break her in half
The bartender let me pay my bar tab with my itunes giftcards.
Please tell me you are a size medium in men's clown onesies and that you forgot them here last night.....
When you started Hi-fiving people I knew u were fucking gone. You slapped some dude on the shoulder when he wouldn't hi-five you and he asked if he even knew you
you smelled like vodka, i think that's why my grandma liked you
you just stood there spinning and got mad if anyone tried to stop you
There is a nerf war going on here. I just cleaned the blood out of the fridge
I think online classes were designed around the concept of day drinking.
You went down on Rachel in front me last night. Worst. Brother. Ever.
if all that ever happens for the rest of forever is drinking wine and eating popcorn, ill be okay
Well, I made it thru a doorway, so I think things are going good.
to have them in my mouth would be like meeting a unicorn while floating on a cloud of glitter
Oh god I want to come home! They have an air raid siren here that alerts their neighbours across the desert it's time to come over on atvs and drink.
Something like that. Healthy diet of beer, ranch sunflower seeds and sex keeps me young.
It's volleyball. Just do it. You want to look sporty. Save sexy librarian for another day.
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